Everyone's a Little Bit Racist

I FINALLY saw Avenue Q tonight with Yoni, his bro Eric, and his sister-in-law Orly, and unsurprisingly, I very much enjoyed and highly recommend. Watching a couple of puppets simulate intercourse is a little awkward, but I'd say it's worth it. Plus, I got a double dose pride with lines about how Jews have all the money and hitting on NYU girls.

Another interesting aspect of the evening? Daniel Sterman getting engaged. Yes, the first guy in our grade at Ramaz to get engaged is none other than the Star Trek-loving contortionist himself. He's a sweet kid and I'm sure as hell happy for him, but who saw this coming? I still think of Daniel Sterman as the kid who first found out about 9/11, and none of us listened. A bunch of us were sitting around the library in the morning, probably after Hashkamah minyan, and Sterman announces that he just saw on CNN.com that a plane flew into the World Trade Center. Everyone thought that was really funny (because really, who took all aspects of that into consideration, even if they actually thought he was being serious) and told him to shut the hell up. Then another one, and everyone thought that was even funnier. Then the announcement came over the loudspeaker, and well, I guess we all know what came next.

Anyway, so good for Sterman, Mazel Tov if by some chance in hell he ever reads this, another one bites the dust.

As for me, I'm in a state of semi-panic about turning 22. What the hell is 22, anyway? There is nothing exciting about it - in fact, nothing exciting about any upcoming birthdays. To someone like me, that's a fate worse than death. That may be a big reason why I'm throwing myself a birthday party...Anyway, at least I'm crossing some things off my list that I feel like I should have done by now. I finally saw Avenue Q. I did Locks of Love...twice. I got a valid ID. (Let's not discuss the fact that it's a non-drivers ID). I went to three European countries that aren't England. I actively lost some weight. (So what if I'm eating Pringles and bagel chips as I write this? They're both low fat!) I learned how to cook a Shabbos meal. (If soup from a box, deli roll, shake 'n bake chicken, cranberry crunch, pumpkin pie, and brownies qualify.) I got my own credit card, opened a checking account, and got a job for spring semester.

Now if only I could get a license, pay off my credit card bill, learn how to make salad, and get a checkbook (or what I like to call, "the things that actually matter") I'd be in wonderful shape.

Oh, and to clarify, I very much appreciate presents from my Sephora registry and want everything on it. I just don't want anyone to feel me they have to buy me anything. Also, getting me the second present off the registry is even better than getting the first. I hope that clears some stuff up.

And to those who received the original Daily Dahlia (Oh Querks, I'm glad it is no longer missing from your life. So sorry for the empty black hole that has been your life since it vanished!), I saw Brian (or what I like to call "the break from Jews experiment"), and it was decidedly unexciting. He's such a loser frat boy now with his ugly Asian girlfriend. (Nothing against Asian women, I think they're hot. She's just unattractive.) How did I ever get him to come to Estihana with me and some friends? So weird. So long ago.

Seacrest, out! (HOW MUCH DO YOU HATE THAT GUY?!)